Tuesday, April 9, 2019

Poor Doenuts

From that friend again:

So, following my previous post I have discovered that we, apparently, do do that here. I have had to dig deep and dust off some proverbs in order to help me through. Here now are "Poor Doenuts' Proverbs for Early Spring Frustrations in a Toxic School Environment". I share them here because I hope you find them useful. These apply only to toxic school environments. All you "healthy climate" colleagues out there can keep it moving. If you have any you use, feel free to drop it in the comment section.

Stop working. If you're working hard, then someone else is controlling your reputation while you're not looking.

When being forced to eat horsesh__, reassure yourself that it, at least, comes from a thoroughbread of good ideas.

Always use your left hand to pull a knife out of your back. You'll need the right to defend yourself from others when things are real bad.

You're not perfect, and everyone who wants your job or classroom will remind you of that ad naseum.

Never forget your flawes. No one else will and most will want to remind you.

If you had absolutely anything at all to do with anything at all, it will be your fault.

If you don't think you'll be blamed, you'll be blamed.

Remember, no one pushes a person's buttons better than a teacher .. and all of you coworkers are teachers.

Booze will only get you through one night. Jesus, on the other hand, ain't only there on Sundays.

If there is anyway at all someone will undo your work, they will.

If they can't steal a good idea, they'll screw it until it dies. If they can't kill it, they'll come after you. It's best to just let the baby go.

Always have three places in the building where you can do your work.

Always have three places in the building where you can get some peace.

Calendars are like letting your adversaries know what you're planning. If anyone asks you to "calendar" they are looking to screw you over. Give them bad dates!

Always have three places from which to get coffee.

Practice these words: "Hello. I don't know. Goodbye" and say only them to the adults for an entire week. If that doesn't settle things down, call out sick.

When things get real tough, it's only a day out of your CAR.

If you're out of days from your CAR and things get real tough, add the cost of alcohol, a good movie and a session with your therapist. If that all comes to more than $130, take the damn day.

If nothing is worth ruining your sanity, then why didn't these people tell you two weeks ago? Think about that.

Yes I've got to get coming to work. I know I've got to keep coming to work. Stop saying I've got to keep coming to work. 

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